


If Only You Knew

by NiniAtTheYAC



Category: Agents of S.H.I.E.L.D. (TV)
Genre: F/M, Hurt/Comfort, Jemma Simmons & Skye | Daisy Johnson Friendship, Jemma Simmons Needs a Hug, Missing Scene, PTSD, post 5x14
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-09-07
Updated: 2019-09-07
Packaged: 2020-10-11 14:43:46
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 721
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/20547875
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/NiniAtTheYAC/pseuds/NiniAtTheYAC
Summary: “He is just as likely to succumb to this as anyone of us, after everything we’ve been through! But now is not the time to turn your back on him, and I’ll be damned if anyone thinks they can convince me to abandon him. He is a good man who has simply been through too much.”This little 'missing scene' post 5x14 has been sitting in my Google docs for too long. After the events of the episode, I just wanted to have some emotional resolution.





	If Only You Knew

**Author's Note:**

> Hi all! This is my first time posting a fic, and it's un-betaed. Let me know what you think. I have a bit of a collection of Shield fics written that I've just never had the guts to post before now! -- also the title is a line from Sleeping at Last's "Daughter" for no reason other than I like the line and it felt like something Jemma could have said to anyone in these moments.

“He was talking to himself, or someone, or whatever. You know what, Simmons, it doesn’t really matter the point is he could have killed me! I get that he’s your husband but how can you honestly defend that?” Daisy, having mostly recovered from the pain of her inhibitor being removed, vented to Jemma in the presence of the rest of their mangled team.  
“Daisy, I’m not defending him because he's Fitz, I’m just trying to explain -”  
“Yeah, try to explain how it’s not his fault that he almost killed Yoyo” Mack interjected, taking Daisy’s hand in his and putting a protective arm around Elena. Jemma suddenly was acutely aware of the malice in each of their eyes, she was a pariah to them by association.  
“You don’t understand,” she paused to fight back her tears, “when a brain experiences too much trauma or endures too much stress it will dissociate in order to rationalize the different experiences of the consciousness. Add to that the fact that Fitz has already been a victim of a traumatic childhood and a debilitating brain injury and you have a recipe for some real mental fallout!” Jemma felt desperate as if she was pleading not only for Fitz’s innocence but for her very life. “He was just as likely to succumb to this as anyone of us, after everything we’ve been through! But now is not the time to turn your back on him, and I’ll be damned if anyone thinks they can convince me to abandon him. He is a good man who has simply been through too much.” Tears were pouring down her face, embarrassed, Simmons turned around so she wouldn’t have to look at the mistrusting expressions on her friends' faces.  
“She’s right,” Elena said quietly. “What Fitz did was horrible, but he isn’t our enemy and Mack, Daisy, we don’t have time right now to be angry.”  
“Maybe not, but it doesn’t mean I’m ready to forgive him just yet,” Mack responded. Jemma couldn’t help but feel her blood boil. Some friend you are, she thought as her tears trickled.  
Jemma felt a soft hand on her shoulder, “I get that it’s not his fault, I just need some time. But, Simmons, I know this isn’t easy for you either.” Daisy pulled her in and Jemma’s anger melted as she eased into the embrace of her friend. “I just need him to be okay. I just need Fitz. I can’t think straight without him.” Both women were reminded of a similar conversation that had nearly broken them both not too long ago.  
“You’re not going to lose him, that’s not how your story ends,” Daisy repeated her advice. Eventually, the whole room calmed down enough for the battered team to fall into a restless slumber, but Jemma was tormented by nightmares of Fitz, not his evil ‘Doctor’ self, but his true innocent self. Jemma’s nightmares featured a revolving door of a sad and desperate Fitz, deciding he was no good for her or the team and abandoning her, sacrificing himself, or taking his own life in a range of horrific and terrifying ways. Finally, Jemma couldn’t stand it anymore. She disentangled herself from a blessedly peaceful Daisy and cautiously took to the halls to go back to Fitz’s holding cell. Deke was resting in the small room just outside the glass and Jemma couldn’t help the fond smile that found her face when she saw him. She was so grateful to their orphaned grandson for keeping watch over the greatest man she knew. And she was relieved to note this as evidence that Fitz's' undying loyalty was one trait that had made it down two generations of lineage.  
As she entered the containment room, Fitz shot up in his cot, “Jemma, what are you doing in here?”  
“Turns out I cannot sleep without you.” She answered truthfully. “And, furthermore, I don’t want to sleep without you.” She moved quickly across the floor but remained respectful of his space by sitting only on the very edge of Fitz’s bed.  
“You should go,” his eyes pleaded while he spoke. “What if I hurt you? I don’t want to hurt you.” Jemma rested her hand over his, “I trust you,” she said. “And I can’t even begin to tell you how much I love you.”


End file.
